gray matter

she goes there early...to decorate the hall with gerbera daisies and artful cards with various Zen-like sayings carefully placed on tables with tea lights and confetti. she senses that her own life (as she knows it) is about to turn topsy turvy...and still she decorates and celebrates...herself.

Once In A Lifetime

Talking Heads rule the day...although I have to disagree with the line: "same as it ever was"...because this sure as hell doesn't look like Kansas to me.

hey! i think i know you

this little treat popped up in a strange area of my backyard. (thank you birds!!) i think that this little dandy is a sunflower. what do you think? these are my favorite of flowers. they're hearty and make me smile...every time. about 10 years ago, a couple others just sprouted up out of the rocks of another of my backyards. let's hope it grows tall and strong...it will get plenty of sun at my place.

Jane Doe; Gold Star

I'm not sure if you journal at all. If you do - have you ever gone back to take a look at old entries? Or as a student - ever taken a look at old papers?

There was this brilliant professor in the Women's Studies department at Chico State in the early 2000's. This professor intimidated the shit out of me. I admired the hell out of her. I wrote excellent papers and got grades that refelected as much. But I remember her reminding us to take a look at our work as we grew as students, and as professionals. She said that we'll look back and say "Okay, that wasn't deep" when we thought we submitted a paper that was just that...or a proposal that we thought was spot on. And it might have been...for the time.

What I'm saying here isn't don't try. Write that paper, submit that proposal...or strive for whatever goal it is you set for yourself.

What I am saying is this: what we do is always subject to revision and improvement.

And thank Goddess for that.

Keep plugging along.....

A

Dance Like Nobody's Watching

...but don't wear cheap shoes...

can you hear what i hear?

Hey...can you hear that? That's what it sounds like when you're not talking.

the detention files

i was shocked to see that one of my junior high school friends had a copy of one these....i remember them well...my most common offense: uniform violation. if only i still had a copy of one of those...the write up or the uniform!!!

the rugburns

enjoyable evening with friend...yummy food - or should i say, hummus infused garlic ;)

as is the norm when you step out for an evening in redding - you're going to run into people you know --- from present, or past lives. you just accept that this is going to happen and deal...it's inevitable. like taxes.

so you enjoy your present company, the garlic infused hummus, the music...and then he walks in. not the guy you're going to meet. but the guy who didn't call. it's been a while and frankly, there aren't any hard feelings. besides, you have mutual friends. again, it's inevitable...you deal.

but then the guy leaves the table he is sitting at with his present squeeze and friends that keep glancing over at your table...and he swoops in to...

see how you've been. to apologize. explain why he didn't call. (okay - you had me at the apology...really.) besides, you've been duped for ordering hummus but were served garlic with a dash of the garbanzo (much to your secret delight). so you try to get through the awkward smalltalk with garlic breath. he lingers. you wonder. you smell like your grandparents house. god love them.

and then it begins to feel a lot like you trying to make him feel better about not calling. because really...if it were about you...he would've called. it's inevitable. like taxes.