A Puddle of Ice Cream Treats

Pop Lock & Drop It

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 06:19:00 +0000

Today I fell down. I fall a lot - as anyone who has spent minute amounts of time with me know. My tumble this afternoon took place on Burnside in Portland. I was walking past a rescue mission with a friend...ironically we were talking about my weak ankles as I looked up to see a man inside the shelter lobby wave to me. I waved back and carried on about the ankles. Then as we proceeded past a row of homeless people sitting along the wall I slipped on a banana peel. Immediately one of the homeless men rushed to my aid. I was startled and embarresed. Talking about my frequent falls only to fall during my lament about...frequent falling. All of this in a pair of no-slip clogs. Screw it...I favor caution when choosing my footwear, but I'm just going to fall anyway...might as well do it in sexy shoes.

Thank you to that man who helped me when I fell down today...you never know who is going to come to your rescue.

The Geeklet Has Landed

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:02:00 +0000

I packed up the moving truck Saturday morning and hit the road with Ms. V wailing in the kitty carrier nestled in the passenger seat. There were no overwhelming feelings of sadness, or anxiety. However, I did drive the truck (the first quarter of the trip) as if it were much larger than it was (there's a joke in there somewhere...) Finally, I relaxed and drove long stretches in silence. The adventure has begun.

I am officially at-large in the Pacific Northwest.

What will I miss?

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 16:15:00 +0000

I'm sitting in the kitchen looking out the window at Bally. Friends have made the trek to Disneyland this week and I'm here at the helm. This has been a nice precurser to the two weeks ahead where I have to pack and wind things down here in Redding. Leaving hasn't really sunk in yet...maybe it won't be this dramatic thing after all...maybe I'm actually ready to go. But I wonder...

What will I miss?

It's a question that can't be answered for a while, I know. But as I sit here looking out the window, feeling the cool pre-autumn breeze I ponder such things. I know I will miss hearing the train several times a day, the horn that sounds at Gerlinger's, Post Office burgers, dear friends, Whiskeytown...my grandma. The rest will have to wait to sink in...it might surprise me.

leap of faith

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 02:21:00 +0000

changes. scary, exciting changes. i mentioned earlier this year that 35 was going to be a birthday that i had mixed feelings about. well, i turned 35 last week. this week i'm looking a possible move square in the face. nothing is official yet. all i can say for sure is that should it become official - i've got a lot to do.

i've got to buy a car - rent a uhaul (and there wasn't even a first date...damn!)- learn the lay of the land where i don't know a soul and bid farewell to redding - my home for the past 18 years. yeah, i'm scared shitless...but also excited.

perhaps in a few weeks time i will be pondering this move from the other end...

"I'm looking for an airport"

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 04:20:00 +0000

Okay, so it has been a while. Summer has a way of offering all sorts of outdoor alternatives to the computer, iPhone, or Blackberry.

I've spent some time in Portland, Oregon this month - a place that I've been casually flirting with for enough time to pass that warrants a real commitment, or shelving the idea. For the first time I really looked around and thought about living there...sending out resumes and cover letters like a fiend. With some positive responses. Responses that warrant my serious consideration. And soon.

My house is packed and I know that I have considered one pitstop before I leave Redding. But I might just forego it for a straight shot this time. I've made several detours here already. All of them interesting and significant. How well do I pack these boxes?

Redding has been a part of my life since I was 9 - when my dad flew planes and we would fly up as a family often. At that time, there was a small airport in the Enterprise area of town. My dad would fly over my grandmothers house and he would dip he wings so we knew to head on down to the airport (again, no iPhones, Blackberry or otherwise). I don't care if it is that tiny Enterprise airport or Frankfurt...I love airports. The comings and goings of it all! One particular departure from Redding had us on our typical route. Somewhere near Red Bluff,a strange noise filled the small 4 seater cabin and my dad talked to the control tower. Mom looked back at me to see how I was. Apparently I sat there with my hands clenched prayer-style and I was looking out the window for something. Mom asked about my window search and I replied "I'm looking for airports". We flew on home just fine.

No move needs to be so dramatic as that glitch...but there is no doubt, that at some point soon...there will be a new airport.

back in a jiff....

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 00:46:00 +0000

woah...it's looking a little dusty over here. go grab yourself a beverage. i"ll be back soon

a

we have a trio, folks

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 12:36:00 +0000

no more "wings", no more glittery "white glove" and no more "sweepstakes"..

when sleep eludes me

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 19:46:00 +0000

Hmm…well, I was hot. Then my brain would NOT power down. I started thinking about a bazillion things, then experienced anxiety about moving and what I’m going to do with some bigger items, and work (is my job secure?), is my parents’ health okay?…the stuff that keeps a lot of adults up at night I suppose. So I went outside and sat on the porch for a while (about 12:30) and watched a couple satellites, and a rather large bat fly over, listened to somebody do their dishes and enjoyed the cool breeze for a while.

to everything, there is a season

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 00:14:00 +0000

today i walked down the street with an umbrella in one hand and a cup of hot chocolate in the other...in redding, california.

gray matter

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sat, 30 May 2009 06:02:00 +0000

she goes there early...to decorate the hall with gerbera daisies and artful cards with various Zen-like sayings carefully placed on tables with tea lights and confetti. she senses that her own life (as she knows it) is about to turn topsy turvy...and still she decorates and celebrates...herself.

Once In A Lifetime

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sun, 24 May 2009 21:34:00 +0000

Talking Heads rule the day...although I have to disagree with the line: "same as it ever was"...because this sure as hell doesn't look like Kansas to me.

hey! i think i know you

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Fri, 22 May 2009 03:12:00 +0000

this little treat popped up in a strange area of my backyard. (thank you birds!!) i think that this little dandy is a sunflower. what do you think? these are my favorite of flowers. they're hearty and make me smile...every time. about 10 years ago, a couple others just sprouted up out of the rocks of another of my backyards. let's hope it grows tall and strong...it will get plenty of sun at my place.

Jane Doe; Gold Star

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Thu, 21 May 2009 03:30:00 +0000

I'm not sure if you journal at all. If you do - have you ever gone back to take a look at old entries? Or as a student - ever taken a look at old papers?

There was this brilliant professor in the Women's Studies department at Chico State in the early 2000's. This professor intimidated the shit out of me. I admired the hell out of her. I wrote excellent papers and got grades that refelected as much. But I remember her reminding us to take a look at our work as we grew as students, and as professionals. She said that we'll look back and say "Okay, that wasn't deep" when we thought we submitted a paper that was just that...or a proposal that we thought was spot on. And it might have been...for the time.

What I'm saying here isn't don't try. Write that paper, submit that proposal...or strive for whatever goal it is you set for yourself.

What I am saying is this: what we do is always subject to revision and improvement.

And thank Goddess for that.

Keep plugging along.....

A

Dance Like Nobody's Watching

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sun, 10 May 2009 19:12:00 +0000

...but don't wear cheap shoes...

can you hear what i hear?

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Thu, 07 May 2009 12:57:00 +0000

Hey...can you hear that? That's what it sounds like when you're not talking.

the detention files

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sat, 02 May 2009 22:40:00 +0000

i was shocked to see that one of my junior high school friends had a copy of one these....i remember them well...my most common offense: uniform violation. if only i still had a copy of one of those...the write up or the uniform!!!

the rugburns

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sat, 02 May 2009 04:26:00 +0000

enjoyable evening with friend...yummy food - or should i say, hummus infused garlic ;)

as is the norm when you step out for an evening in redding - you're going to run into people you know --- from present, or past lives. you just accept that this is going to happen and deal...it's inevitable. like taxes.

so you enjoy your present company, the garlic infused hummus, the music...and then he walks in. not the guy you're going to meet. but the guy who didn't call. it's been a while and frankly, there aren't any hard feelings. besides, you have mutual friends. again, it's inevitable...you deal.

but then the guy leaves the table he is sitting at with his present squeeze and friends that keep glancing over at your table...and he swoops in to...

see how you've been. to apologize. explain why he didn't call. (okay - you had me at the apology...really.) besides, you've been duped for ordering hummus but were served garlic with a dash of the garbanzo (much to your secret delight). so you try to get through the awkward smalltalk with garlic breath. he lingers. you wonder. you smell like your grandparents house. god love them.

and then it begins to feel a lot like you trying to make him feel better about not calling. because really...if it were about you...he would've called. it's inevitable. like taxes.

still

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:40:00 +0000

on the way home from work...

on the way to the stairs down to the parking garage a woman comments that the weather is strange this afternoon. i agree and the woman adds "it feels like earthquake weather". my thoughts exactly. overcast, still...something a bit off. i prepare for my scooter ride home...my first legal ride since i passed the driving test this morning. on the the short commute i can smell bbq, rain and electricity - and while there is something unsettling about this "earthquake weather" i think the air smells quite delicious!

that rain did come, along with some hail and thunder. i'm off to go have a look at my t.v. that was a screen of pixels when i last left the room.

loca lemons!

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 03:31:00 +0000

here's something to make you laugh....note the crazed expression - for emphasis, of course! this was my first crack at making a cake from scratch...i'm a little (crazily) proud. this goes nicely with lemonade, bbq chicken salad and lovely friend with sheepdog ;)

just loved this one...

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 04:05:00 +0000

By Martha Beck

(OPRAH.com) -- Shortly after World War II, executives at Japan's Toyota Motor Company made a decision from which, I believe, we all can benefit. They decided to make cars the way they'd make, say, sushi.

Unlike most manufacturers, which bought and stored massive stockpiles of supplies, Toyota began ordering just enough parts to keep their lines moving, just when those parts were needed. This made them spectacularly productive, and turned the phrase "just in time" into business legend.

I know of the Toyota case because in my former life as an academic, I taught international business management. My students and I had some rousing discussions about just-in-time (JIT) manufacturing, as well as its alternative, which is known as just-in-case (JIC) inventory.

These students were the first people who hired me as a life coach (perhaps because I could never resist applying business theory to everyday life). When we discussed JIT versus JIC management as a lifestyle strategy, we concluded that Toyota's business innovation could positively impact all of our lives. If you feel overburdened, overstressed, and anxious, I'm betting the same is true for you. Oprah.com: 6 ways to let go of stress

Why just-in-case is just crazy

Most people live with a just-in-case mind-set because for most of human history, it made sense. The primary fact of life for just-in-case processes is: "Everything good is scarce!"

By contrast, just-in-time systems rely on the assumption "Everything good is readily available." Well, until quite recently, the former claim was true for most humans -- it's still true for many. But most magazine readers like you live in settings where basic necessities, like food, clothing, and other humans, are plentiful.

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Living in an abundant environment but operating on the assumption that good things are scarce leads to a host of dysfunctions that can be summed up in one word: excess. Most of us are living in some kind of excess; we work too much, eat too much, rack up debt buying too much stuff. Yet, driven by the unconscious, just-in-case assumption that "everything good is scarce," we just keep doing and accumulating more. We've all seen some of the unfortunate results, and I've found that most fall into the following four categories:

Starving off the fat of the land

For years I noticed that my clients who lived in a mind-set of scarcity had trouble controlling their weight, even though they dieted assiduously. I also read studies showing that poor women -- particularly those who periodically starved themselves to feed their children -- were particularly plagued by obesity.

Researchers hypothesize that when the body knows it may be starved, whether by poverty or by dieting, it activates automatic just-in-case mechanisms that store fat on the body to get through the next "famine." Ironically, this biological just-in-case mechanism puts fat on precisely the people with the discipline to starve themselves.

Stuff tsunamis

Just-in-case thinking triggers primal, unconscious impulses to hoard good stuff, fat supplies being just one example. Combine JIC attitudes with a superabundant culture, and things can go wildly off kilter.

There have been several cases like the one in Shelton, Washington, where a woman recently suffocated under a pile of her own possessions. To recover her body, police reported having to "climb over [clutter] on their hands and knees. In some areas, their heads were touching the ceiling while they were standing on top of piles of debris." Oprah.com: Get rid of your clutter for good!

Money madness

My wealthiest clients have taught me that having lots of money doesn't quiet scarcity-based, JIC anxiety.

This point was reinforced for me when I heard about the suicide of the German billionaire who lost hundreds of millions of dollars in the recent financial crisis. Now, this poor guy wasn't literally a poor guy. He still had a personal fortune. But to a just-in-case thinker who's used to billions, it wasn't enough to keep him from throwing himself in front of a train.

Love's labor's lost

Just-in-case thinking destroys relationships faster than -- and sometimes with the assistance of -- a speeding bullet. Along with the impulse to hoard objects, it also triggers excessive attempts to control our supply of love -- that is, other people. So anxious lovers have their partners followed. Parents micromanage children. People-pleasers try to manipulate everyone into liking them.

This behavior isn't love; it's a fear-based outcome of believing love is scarce. If you've ever been on the receiving end of such anxious machinations, you know they make you want to run, not bond. Oprah.com: How to stop being a people pleaser!

Why just-in-time just makes sense:

As Toyota execs and my graduate students concluded so many years ago, hanging on to a just-in-case worldview in abundant environments is plain bad business. And as I've seen in countless coaching scenarios since, switching to a just-in-time mind-set ("Everything good is readily available") restores health and balance to our lives.

The great news is that just one mental shift -- focusing on the abundance of your environment -- switches your psychological settings so that your life automatically improves in many areas you may think are unrelated. This is essentially a leap from fear to faith; it's not religious faith but the simple belief that we'll probably be able to get what we need when we need it. When the issues above are considered through abundance-based, just-in-time thinking, it's a whole different ball game:

Food fulfillment

I've never been a weight loss coach; my focus is on helping people go from fear and suffering to relaxation and happiness. So I was baffled when many of my clients told me, "I'm finally losing weight -- and I'm not even trying."

This intrigued me so much that I spent years researching and writing a book about it ["The Four-Day Win"]. After reading thousands of studies and interviewing dozens of experts, I'm convinced that the thought "Everything good is readily available" kicks the body out of its panicky, fat-storing mode and into a state that helps it shed excess fat.

Stuff sufficiency

Dianne is 50-ish and newly divorced. Part of our coaching work helped her develop just-in-time confidence about money (which allowed her to leave the financial security of her emotionally dead marriage).

During our final session, she said, "Something weird is happening. All of a sudden, I'm tidy. I've always been a stuff person, but now I don't add clutter. It's a wonderful, spacious feeling." Dianne didn't achieve this by forcing herself to clean up. She simply developed the confidence of a just-in-time manager, and her behavior changed almost on its own.

Mellow money management

"I got really panicky when the economy went south," says Jackie, one of my fellow coaches. "All my business dried up, and I was really scared. But I hate feeling scared, and I'm a coach, so one day I coached myself back to trusting life. I felt better immediately, but what's strange is that clients started coming out of the woodwork. I had to start a waiting list."

This, as any Toyota alum will tell you, is what happens to people who have enough confidence to run a just-in-time operation. I can't quite explain this; it often seems nothing short of miraculous.

Perhaps this is why the authors of the Bible included the story of the wandering Israelites who were given manna from heaven, but only permitted to gather enough to supply their needs until the next manna-festation. Whether you take it literally or metaphorically, this tale was considered important enough to become holy writ. Why? I believe it's to counteract the just-in-case anxiety that makes billionaires keep hoarding more money.

The Israelite story-keepers wanted to remind readers that, miraculous as it seems, just-in-time confidence keeps supply lines clear and prosperity flowing.

Lasting Love

I've done my share of just-in-case controlling when it comes to love (I'd like to apologize to anyone who once wandered into my danger zone). Happily, I've learned that setting people free, not trying to control them, ensures a lifetime supply of love.

Here's the closest thing I know to a genuine love spell: "I'll always love you, and I really don't care what you do."

This is not a promise to stay in a relationship with someone whose behavior is destructive. It's a simple statement that you aren't dependent on the other person's choices. That means you can respond to someone as he or she really is, instead of trying to force a fallible person to be infallible. Knowing that love (like all good things) is readily available, we don't need to control any individual. And oh, how people love being loved without a care. Oprah.com: 6 love decisions we've made for you

Making the switch:

When I meet someone who's a mess of excess, I just itch to coach them. I know that if they'd reroute a few simple brain habits, their lives would improve almost effortlessly. The transformation wouldn't take much work -- no need to exhume childhood traumas or hook up an antidepressant IV.

We'd just throw the neurological toggle switch that exchanges fight-or-flight mode (the sympathetic nervous system) for rest-and-relaxation mode (the parasympathetic nervous system). Most animals experience this switch in response to environmental conditions. We humans possess an unparalleled ability to create it with our thoughts.

It's almost too easy: Simply by taking your attention off thoughts of scarcity and persistently focusing on observations of abundance, you can replace the nervous, just-in-case mind-set that kept our ancient forebears alive but is killing many of us.

The best way to effect this shift is to use these simple exercises:

1. List 10 times you thought that there wouldn't be enough of something and you survived.

2. List 10 areas where you have too much, not too little.

3. List 20 -- or 50, or 1,000 -- wonderful things that entered your life just at the right time, with no effort on your part. Start with the little things (oxygen, sunlight, a song on the radio). You'll soon think of bigger ones. Most of my clients realize that the most important things in their lives showed up this way.

I started doing exercise No. 3 several years ago, and I still haven't finished my list. Once you deliberately focus on abundance, you'll be overwhelmed by all the good things that show up like manna in the desert, without much effort on your part. If this seems too easy, you can go back to fearful, just-in-case thinking (you'll need a diet counselor, a housekeeper, and a financial planner, but that's okay -- they can substitute for friends).

But if, like me, my business school students, and my clients, you decide to try just-in-time thinking, you'll find yourself struggling less and accomplishing more in ways you'd never expect. You may kick yourself for not discovering this sooner. Relax. I promise, you're just in time.

orange popsicles and lemonade

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 04:34:00 +0000

it looks like it is that time of year....

2 Adults, 1 Child & a Chicken

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 15:10:00 +0000

I love houseguests who arrive bearing gifts! Wine...chocolate...yum. My cousin, her husband and son arrived Friday evening with another guest - one that would leave me a gift daily. A pet chicken. As I helped my cousin and her husband unpack their car Friday evening; my cousin asked "So, how do you feel about us bringing our pet chicken?". Me, intrigued as ever did not send them packing to the nearest Motel 6. So here are some pictures from the weekend...

NorCal Aids Challenge

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 13:41:00 +0000

Welcome to the last workday of this week...hopefully it was a good one for all of you. If you celebrate Easter - may you have a wonderful weekend celebrating with your friends & family. Save some chocolate for me.

In about one month I will be partiicpating in the NorCal Aids Challenge. A 330 mile bicycle ride through California's Central Valley. "Wow...when did she start training for that?" you ask. Ha...no, no...I'm participating as a crew member - but I still am raising money toward the cause. You can check out the webpage here http://www.norcalaidschallenge.net/ and type in my name if you want to donate. Many thanks!

Cheers and Chocolate Easter Bunnies!

A

the moon or new york city

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 00:32:00 +0000

a break in my new obsession: the police auction came in the form of a picture message sent to my cell followed up by a phone call. a friend is doing some travel on the east coast - she calls me this evening from times square. ~sigh~ tickled that she chose to call me up and share the moment - i wish i could be there too. she asks me what time it is here...i am thrown for a moment...it's the usual 3 hours earlier...but then, east coast time is always dear to this girl.

That quaint, country livin'

noreply@blogger.com (Ambercita) — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 18:48:00 +0000

It isn't for me. Recent change of plans for a long weekend later in the month: Change requires swapped mode of transportation - plane? train? Both modes are ludicrously expensive, or long - respectively. In order to fly out of this town - you must offer up a small child (not necessariy your own) and choose between 2 times to fly...OR, hop the train in the middle of the night if the train arrives on time at all (last time I took the train, it was 3 hours late...and that is typical). Usually, these kinds of "adventures" are totally my thing. Not today. For a place that isn't big on growth and getting people to stay for long periods of time - they also make it quite hard to leave by any other mode aside from a personal vehicle. Yes...I'm feeling a bit snarky today. Bleh!!!